Various thoughts and observations from the last few days

My apologies in advance for how long this is. I started it on Monday when it turned out I had no psych class, and I haven't had any more time to work on it until now, thanks to school. So there is probably going to be more here than I originally intended.....


How well do you know the voice of God? Why do we all hear it in such different ways?

This past Thursday was all-campus worship. Yes, it was a lot of fun and I got to spend time with the people I love and got to worship God with them. That was great! But I also realized some things. First of all, the more I am aware of the Lord's presence, the harder it is to stand. I mean physically stand. When I am in the presence of the all-powerful God of the universe, how can I possibly dream of being anywhere but on my knees? I was forced to the ground by just a glimpse of the presence of God in the room.

I've also been thinking about how we hear God since then. The speaker told us about how he hears an audible voice. I've never heard God that way. He tends to speak to me through other people and media sources, and through the way he changes my heart when I'm not looking. I never heard a voice in my head telling me to serve on the city streets, but no matter where I went or what I read or what verses I found, that is the message I heard until I finally said "Ok God, I'll go!" and then the messages promptly changed and moved on to other instructions. I also wasn't planning on going officially into ministry with this. It was going to be my job, my life's work, but ministry? I didn't want to do that! And then one day I found myself talking about how my calling is urban missions and ministry. God changed me from the heart out while I wasn't even watching.

One of the most surprising changes for me is how he is softening my heart day by day. A few years ago I stopped crying, stopped reacting to a lot of things. I would hear bad things and stay totally calm on the outside, whether I wanted to or not. Lately however, I find myself crying again, and not just about things that hurt me, but also for the suffering of others. The Lord is making me vulnerable again. As much as that may open me up to hurt in the future, I am so thankful. Praise be to God!

And now on to other (not so) random thoughts.....

Ok, so I'm sure many of you have read this verse before. It is a classic when we are talking about community. But before you hurriedly scan down the page to the next subject, stop and think about what this actually means....

Acts 2:42-47
"They devoted themselves to the apostles' teaching and to the fellowship, to the breaking of bread and to prayer. Everyone was filled with awe, and many wonders and miraculous signs were done by the apostles. All the believers were together and had everything in common. Selling their possessions and goods, they gave to anyone as he had need. Every day they continued to meet together in the temple courts. The broke bread in their homes and ate together with glad and sincere hearts, praising God and enjoying the favor of all the people. And the Lord added to their number daily those who were being saved."

It's radical. As a Christian, there is nothing I have that I can call "mine." And I'm not just talking about the things we share everyday as a matter of course, like school supplies, jewelry, clothes, books, etc. If I really take time to think about it, I can only conclude that my laptop is not mine either. My teddy bear is not mine. The money saved up for my college education is not mine. My cell phone is not mine.

I had lunch with one of the InterVarsity people from LAR this week and found out that she is short $2000 for paying for school. Several people at the table said they would pray for her but I sat there wondering; Why is that often our only answer to need? The Bible is full of examples of believers providing for one another in concrete and tangible ways. Yes, praying for fulfillment of a need is important, but there are so many of us in IV that coming up with $2000 to help one of our members should not be all that hard.

That said, here is my challenge to you (and to myself!): Live as a Christian community. Don't put it off till we graduate, don't say that it isn't possible here. If anything, the setup of the dorms should make it easier. If you're one of the people that has read Irresistible Revolution, consider the dorms a premade intentional community :-)
Here's some simple things that I think we can and should do:
1) Like the disciples in Acts 2, we should hold everything in common. If you need something, ask. If someone asks you, don't say no. Personally, I think that we're pretty good (but far from perfect) about sharing when asked here in BE, but maybe not so good on the asking portion. Part of having everything in common is that we need to speak up when we need something, otherwise we may never know our friends have just the thing to take care of the problem.
2) The disciples sold their possessions if they needed to in order to fulfill a need in their community. If we know of a need, we shouldn't just sit around hoping that somehow things will work out. Figure out how to take care of it!
3)Be intentional about eating meals with other people. It's no fun eating alone anyway, so make plans with people! Have regular area and inter-area dinners! You get the idea :-) (This is where I left off on Monday, and since then I've had lunch with somebody every day....it's been a blast!)

I'm finally getting a chance to catch my breath this week, at least in regards to the wild rollercoaster God has had me on lately. I feel like I've reached the bottom of the first hill and I'm just about to start going up the next. It couldn't have come at a better time though; I had three midterms this week, the last of which I finished about an hour ago. Therefore I am braindead, or maybe a zombie.

I guess I should probably just post this and call it a night.