This takes up time, but I don't care.

Changing schools is hard. Really hard. I've just gotten all settled in here, and now I have to uproot myself yet again. You'd think I'd be good at this by now after doing it in Costa Rica and then here, but this has become home for me.
I realized today that it isn't U of I that I'm going to miss. It's a wonderful school, but I will have no problems leaving it. Leaving the community at InterVarsity though, is going to be very very hard. I love those people. There is nothing like being part of a group of people that is totally on fire for God. Everybody there is there because they want to be, and It's amazing to hear about God's calling on so many of their lives. I love these people, and I've only known them a few months.
I have so many ideas and dreams for what next year could be like if I stayed, ways to grow our area from 5 or 6 people into a big group.
But it seems God's plan is taking me away from here.

I'm having trouble trusting him, which feels so funny to say, because I've been trusting him with so much lately, and that's how all this came about. But its true. Now that I'm being asked to give up something dear to me, I'm having trouble trusting that God's plan is better. It reminds me of last night. I was rather reluctant to go swing dancing with my friend Laura, because I have no idea what I'm doing out there on the dance floor, but by the end of the night it was I who didn't want to leave, not Laura. Please pray that I would let go and let God lead!

Right now my biggest question is whether I want to go to a Christian school or not. For curriculum purposes, I'd really like to. I'd like to learn social work from a God-honoring perspective. However, in all other areas I want to attend a non-Christian school. I feel like the small IV community we have here at this big public institution is more alive, more full of joy, more desiring to chase after God than the community at most Christian schools. I could be wrong; mom likes to remind me that I probably am whenever I bring this up, but someone else seconded my opinion today.
I also don't want to lose the opportunity for outreach that I have here. Here we as Christians stand out, we're a light and people wonder what we have, wonder at the peace in our lives. How much can we do that on a Christian campus? Or maybe what I should ask is How much does that actually happen on a Christian campus? I'm scared to fall into a rather spiritually dead zone, where people are really good at following the rules and really good at singing the songs and talking the talk, but miss the point. I know that if it weren't for the time I spent without the proximity of the church, I would still be in that place today. Thank God for the hardships of Costa Rica!
hehe....that reminds me of Romans 5:1-11

¹Therefore, since we have been justified through faith, we have peace with God through our Lord Jesus Christ, ²through whom we have gained access by faith into this grace in which we now stand. And we rejoice in the hope of the glory of God. ³Not only so, but we also rejoice in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; ⁴perseverance, character; and character, hope. ⁵And hope does not disappoint us, because God has poured out his love into our hearts by the Holy Spirit, whom he has given us.

⁶You see, at just the right time, when we were still powerless, Christ died for the ungodly. ⁷Very rarely will anyone die for a righteous man, though for a good man someone might possibly dare to die. ⁸But God demonstrates his own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us.

⁹Since we have now been justified by his blood, how much more shall we be saved from God's wrath through him! ¹⁰For if, when we were God's enemies, we were reconciled to him through the death of his Son, how much more, having been reconciled, shall we be saved through his life! ¹¹Not only is this so, but we also rejoice in God through our Lord Jesus Christ, through whom we have now received reconciliation.

I WILL TRUST IN GOD.....no matter how hard it is, no matter how many times I fail at it and have to start over, no matter what strange and unexpected places he takes me.

I WILL REJOICE IN THE LORD......for he is good! His love endures forever!

Well, thats about it.....a quick update on what's going on right now besides the random thoughts in my head:

• Lots of people have been suggesting schools to me. I appreciate that, because then I know at least one person likes the school, but to make things easier for me, please make sure the school is accredited before suggesting it. You can do that here. Go down to the bottom of the page, select what state your school is in, put in baccalaureate for program level, and press search. If your school shows up, it is accredited.
• I have a meeting with the department of social work here on Tuesday. Please pray that I get something useful from it!
• So far I'm looking at Calvin, Anderson, Taylor, Bradley, and Loyola. I haven't gotten through the accredited schools list yet, so I expect this to change. My favorite so far is Loyola, but it is waaaaaaay out of my affordability range. Yet another thing to pray about!
• Three of the IV area groups here are doing 30 hour famine this weekend. Please pray that it goes well. Also, I'm leading one of the prayer times on Saturday, so I would appreciate your prayers for that too.